I’m on my third glass of Coke as I type away. Of course not enjoying it what with the gas, my twitchy nose and watery eyes but thinking I could do worse with the leftover Sprite. I feel Sprite lacks spine which it tries to compensate in sweetness, like that undecided kid that doesn’t know what they want.
So Coke it is. There was an office shindig earlier so peeps packed up after that and headed out. Most contented that they did their fair share of work. I haven’t.
I have to think. Meditate even. That zen doctrine has been getting to me since I started reading The Secret. Now don’t give me that look, I know you read it ages ago.
Anywhu, my favourite feature of this particular book are the ancient page vibes I get. They conjure imagination of scribes dipping their quills in ink and writing line after line of old adage on thirsty parchment. Probably diminutive aristocrats with them moccasins and fancy hats sitting jauntily on their heads, putting airs they wish they had.
The fewer mortals I engage with during this numbing process, the better. Though there’s a colleague laughing uproariously about a funny video he’s watching. By the sound of it I would be better off sharing the fun you know. Bah, I’ll just use it as background noise. Shake it off like Taylor Swift, eh?
They say (they being psychologists and their ilk ) the best time to reflect is in a space you feel soothed and in your element. Here you’re able to explore possibilities of things to come. You’re wandering around in your own private mind orgy. Thoughts curled up on sofas, others sauntering around enjoying a glass of Pinot or scattered around the rug knowing they have you by the nuts, in literal sense.
“Such a (insert choice word), she needs to figure us out before she can get anywhere,” reassured thought says.
“She won’t get too far,” the one with the Pinot affirms
“Maybe she’ll shove us in altogether and relegate this to another day when she feels like it.”
“I want to see her try,” arrogant thought says. (She’s got spiked heels and blue braids….lol)
I have alot of time on my hands though the luxury of having a space is out of question. Disregard that conversation up top, that was me being eccentric. I compartmentalize, this way staying sane becomes a possibility.
I read up on meditation and turns out you can set aside afew minutes each day to “centre” yourself and not hours as many imagine. The trick is to put your mind in a state of rest. Visualize stuff that makes you happy, things you want and send all that positive vibe into the Universe. All the while relying on the Law of Attraction to make it happen.
Believe me, I used to roll my eyes about stuff like this then it occurred to me that trying won’t be as hard as dismissing it beforehand. Lets say I’m finding it quite invigorating. This chi would otherwise be a rip off if I didn’t watch those YouTube meditations and decide that I should try them.
I find a calm spot, I loosen my belt, cross my feet, regulate my breathing. I sit there and meditate. I haven’t gotten the hang of chanting yet, though I’m thinking good thoughts. Sunny beaches, lots of sea water, laughter and plenty of food. Definitely, plenty of food. I know I’m doing it all wrong. My priorities should probably be a house, a car, lots of money but in this moment maybe those things don’t mean as much to me as I think they do. (see the twister there :-))
My legs are getting stiff, and this floor is so damn cold, then there’s a chuckle. I open one eye, whats going on? Kumbe my colleague has come to watch me channeling my chi! The one who was watching the videos no less. I’m horrified. I have just became real time entertainment. The chuckle is now a belly laugh, so loud I want to smother him. He’s catching his sides in gleeful mirth. He. Wont. Stop.
I quickly get to my feet, a great excuse forming even before blood can rush back to my calves. He won’t buy it. It sounds weak even in my head. I let it go.
I will not hear the end of it for weeks on end. So avoiding him altogether will be a great idea.
Such a bummer.
Anyone wanna trade places for two weeks?